When I first married and didn’t know how to say no, I sometimes, reluctantly, accepted invitations to play party-bridge. One afternoon, sitting at the table with Ann (from
a wealthy-old family and married to a man from another wealthy-old family), I was shocked when she began talking: “God, I just realized today is Thursday which means I have to give Al “a little” tonight. I’d rather visit my gynecologist
every day than have Al’s hands pushing and probing me for one hour... every week!”
Another woman seated at the same table spoke up: “Ann,
I can’t believe you actually plan sex in advance. How can you control how long it lasts?” That was Ann’s moment to shine: “Of course I plan it. I put it on my calendar, just like my dental appointments and everything else.
I control how long it lasts by setting the alarm clock. Al better be through by the time that alarm goes off because that's my signal to jump up; party time’s over! I chose Thursday evenings because Al’s usually at the farm all day and gets home
dead-dog tired. Also, I have my hair done on Friday mornings, so he can’t ruin a fresh hairdo.
Insatiably curious, the other woman asked: “You mean Al
agrees to only one night a week and for only one hour? Surely he tries to sneak-in some kissing, petting, or a little touchy-feely, on other days.”
Ann rolled her eyes, smiled and confidently replied “Al’s smart enough to know if he complains or tries any “hanky-panky”---I’ll cut off his weekly supply and he won’t “get any” for months!”